Category Archives: Spiritual realm
Courts of Heaven – Where Justice Prevails
Have you been to the courts of heaven yet?
Wait – what? There’s a courtroom in heaven? What does that mean?
Yes, there’s a courtroom in heaven. I’ve heard there are several. It’s a great way to make sure Justice prevails in your life and in the life of your family.
So how does it work?
We all know that God is the Judge of all the earth. The Bible says,
“For the Lord is our judge; the Lord is our lawgiver; the Lord is our king; he will save us.” Isaiah 33:22 ESV
“The LORD judges the peoples; judge me, O LORD, according to my righteousness and according to the integrity that is in me. God is a righteous judge, and a God who feels indignation every day.” Psalm 7:8, 11 ESV
“Shall not the Judge of all the earth do what is just?” Genesis 18:25 ESV
So imagine a courtroom where God is sitting in the judge’s seat. We already know He is righteous and perfect – that means that justice is what He desires. He wants GOOD to triumph over evil.
Just like we are encouraged to come boldly before the throne of grace to find grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:16), we can also come boldly before the court of heaven to find justice to help in time of need.
It’s a very powerful thing to do – to go to the Court of Heaven, present your case and ask God to make a ruling in your favor – for your good and His glory. He loves to do this and He would love to hear your case!
You may have heard the illustration of going before God as the judge and the devil accuses you of sin (breaking the law of God). Then Jesus steps in to advocate for you. You confess your sins and ask the Lord to forgive you. God then makes a ruling in your case that you are “not guilty” because Jesus took your sin on the cross. This is a common sermon illustration I’ve heard many times, especially around Easter.
But what if you could go back to the Court of Heaven regarding specific issues in your life that are not working out in your favor? What would that look like?
There are many books written about the Courts of Heaven – Robert Henderson is a popular author on this topic. I try to keep it simple – the way the Lord taught me. In fact, many of us learned how to go to the court of heaven without having a clue about what we were doing. So you don’t have to know much for it to be effective in your life.
Here are the basic concepts – ask Holy Spirit to highlight to you what you need to know for your individual case.
- There is a court in heaven.
- You can get justice there.
- You can approach the Judge and ask for justice on your case. He already knows about your case, but it can help if you explain it to Him because it gets the issue clear in your own mind what you are asking for.
- You can’t use this for selfish reasons. It’s based on your integrity – the righteousness of your cause.
- It’s a matter of the heart. It’s your trust in God’s goodness and His ability to respond to your needs that enables this process to have effect in your life on earth.
So what does this look like? Obviously it will be different for each person based on their individual case. It’s very hard to generalize. Justice is very personal, isn’t it?
I’ll give you an example to get your imagination started.
Recently someone I know was being targeted by witchcraft. She received a death threat from a powerful person who knew how to travel in the spirit realm. It scared her when this person’s spirit (or soul) showed up in her house and said, “I’m going to kill you.” 😲
She had enough courage to reply, “No, you’re NOT!” and the other person left. But it was still very unnerving.
A short while later she had an accident that caused her a lot of pain. She felt that this accident was tied to that person’s threat. It didn’t kill her but it felt life threatening.
We decided to go to the Court of Heaven to get help. If you can get a restraining order in a natural, earthly court when someone threatens you, then why not ask for the same thing in a heavenly court? So we simply said, “Lord, we would like to go before you in court please.”
As we stood in the Court of Heaven, she could feel the oppression of this threat and felt that this person somehow had access to her. I reminded her that “the curse causeless cannot come” (Proverbs 26:2).
So we asked Holy Spirit, “Is there any legal right or open door that is allowing this?”
Immediately she sensed an agreement she had made with this person when they had worked together in the past. So she said out loud, “I break all agreements that I have made with this person – I no longer want them to have access to my life. I close the door.”
We also prayed some other things regarding the injury she had and she forgave the person who threatened her.
We both sensed a breakthrough and she told me, “Whew! I don’t feel that oppression anymore – it’s lifted! It’s gone! There’s no more access – I feel free!” 🙂
“Going to the court of heaven” is just a way of saying you are willing to deal with any legal ground the enemy has in your life. Someone broke God’s law of love and now you want to deal with it.
The primary issue is Justice. Whenever I see an injustice, it makes me think of the courts of heaven. So if there’s an issue of injustice in your life, please consider whether going there might help you. For instance, if you are working really hard at your job and you keep getting passed over for a promotion, I would ask Holy Spirit if there’s something that needs to be dealt with in the courts of heaven. Or if you have a legal case on earth that is not going well, you can take it there for God to be your judge. Perhaps someone has done you wrong on earth – stolen something from you or cheated you out of something. Go to the court of heaven and ask God what legal ground they have to do that to you. Then follow whatever He tells you – usually there’s something you need to repent of on behalf of yourself or your bloodline. You also generally have to release the other party from your judgement by forgiving them so that God can judge them directly. He honors your judgment and won’t interfere unless you ask Him to step in and take over (I Corinthians 6:2).
I have been to court many times to deal with generational curses. Often when an issue doesn’t go away even after you’ve prayed about it, repented of your part in it and asked God for help, it’s because there’s a deeper issue – someone in your generational bloodline opened a door or allowed something to have a legal right and now it’s been passed down to you. You can repent on behalf of yourself and your bloodline and ask God to break the curse passed down to you from your ancestors. He loves to do that!
Sometimes you really feel as though you are standing in a court room. I’ve had that experience many times. Sometimes you don’t feel or sense anything, but it is still true and the results become obvious in your life. It can help to imagine you are standing before the judge – it can make it feel more real in your heart and mind. Because in one sense you are literally standing before God as your Judge – whether you sense it or not.
Have you been to the courts of heaven yet? If so, what happened when you went? Please comment below – we learn from each other when we share our experiences with God. 🙂
DIY Deliverance & Healing – Sapphire Blessings App
A friend just reminded me of an awesome app for your phone/tablet that has a TON of really good, really deep content that can help you on your path to freedom and wholeness.
It’s called Sapphire Blessings and it’s available on both Apple and Android devices.
You pay a small monthly fee ($4) and you get access to the library of recorded teachings and blessings from Arthur Burk of Sapphire Leadership Group.
Arthur Burk is the first person who taught me the difference between my spirit and my soul. That single insight majorly helped me and set me free of so much stuff! Whenever I share it with someone, it helps them too – I’m amazed that this insight has not become more wide stream yet. You can read about it here.
He’s a little “out of the box” for most people. And to be honest, some of his stuff is too far out there for me. Ask Holy Spirit what you need to hear and follow that leading. 🙂
Arthur has discovered some really good insights and tools to help people, especially people who have not been able to be helped through the usual path of counseling or inner healing prayer. He’s especially good at providing helpful information to those who have severe dissociative identity disorder and those who have been through severe trauma.
He also has a lot of free stuff on his website and on his YouTube channel, if you want to check him out first before paying a monthly fee. You can also search for him by name on YouTube and find even more free content, posted by other people. His series, Blessing Your Spirit, is very powerful. I highly recommend it.
The app description says:
Arthur Burk is not afraid to go where others have not – he’s a true pioneer and forerunner, especially in the realm of inner healing, deliverance and “out of the box” insights.
If you feel drawn, I encourage you to go check him out!
Has an Arthur Burk teaching impacted your life? If so, which one? Please share below to inspire us and help us find the truth that will set us free! Thanks – I really appreciate personal comments from my readers. 😊💗
Break Through Fear! Have More Peace!
When I was first exploring my awareness of the unseen realm, I was really scared! I could sense things, but I couldn’t see them with my eyes. Many of the things I sensed made me very afraid.
I really wrestled with a fear of the unseen realm for many years growing up. I knew it was there and I knew I could sense beings, movement, messages, etc. but at the same time I was very hesitant to explore or learn more.
Have you ever felt that way?
Not only was I afraid of the unseen realm, I was also afraid to talk to anyone about it! I was also afraid of what other people thought of me – I didn’t want to be “weird” for seeing things that other people couldn’t see, right? The fears kind of multiply and build on each other, don’t they?
By the time I was a young adult, I had so many fears on top of fears that it was paralyzing.
Later in life, I finally found the key to break through my fears but boy was it hard work before I found this key! I remember one night I woke up and I could sense darkness in my house – a tangible “something” or someone unseen was there. I lived alone out in the country at the time. It was very dark outside and no one was around (or at least, no one should be around my house in the middle of the night!). I turned on all the lights in the house, but I could still sense this “evil energy”. I was afraid and I had no idea what to do!
I started yelling and praying! I commanded that dark thing to leave – I yelled at it like you might yell at a big dog that was coming to bite you. I got mad! I stamped my foot and stared at the corner where I felt it and then I yelled at it. Then I whirled around to the other side of the room where I felt other “somethings” and did the same thing. It was terrifying but I was so mad that it gave me the energy to fight. I felt like I was chasing out a bunch of cockroaches that had been hidden – so creepy! Like that old commercial from Raid Ant & Roach spray – remember that? LOL
Eventually, I felt peace return to my house. I left the lights on and went back to bed. For years I slept with a night light on, just in case. I hated that experience and I never wanted to encounter creepy invisible things at night ever again!
Years later the Lord taught me an important lesson on Fear that would have really helped me that night.
What I wanted to share today was the Key that helped me break through my fears. Because today I don’t fear the things that I can sense in the middle of the night. In fact, it’s been a long time since I’ve sensed anything creepy in my house because now I’m not afraid. Most of my fears have completely disappeared and I am so happy and at peace!
Recently the Holy Spirit led me to create a short online course to share how the Lord taught me to overcome fear and anxiety (that Key). Here’s the link to the course (or click on the course image below).
This course can really help you if you suffer from fear or anxiety. What I share in this course, I still use today! (because it REALLY works). You can preview the course by clicking the link above – to see if it’s something that you would be interested in.
This course is for:
- People who are tired of living with anxiety every day.
- People who are ready to make a change in order to have more Peace in their lives.
- People who are open to new ways of looking at the world and themselves.
- People who are spiritual and want a connection with something bigger than themselves.
The purpose of this course is to simply help you discover and eliminate the root source of the things that make you feel anxious or afraid. This course will teach you how to cultivate more peace in your daily life and how to more quickly recover from unexpected stressful situations.
- You’ll learn how to remove the source of your anxiety and make it disappear.
- You will be able to more quickly recover from sudden, unexpected stressful situations. What a relief!
- You will be able to cultivate more peace in your daily life, both mentally and emotionally.
- You will overcome specific fears, like the fear of snakes or public speaking, and help others do this too!
A lot of people have been feeling more fearful and anxious since the COVID Pandemic of 2020. It’s like the things we used to be able to depend on are not as dependable as we thought they were – this uncertainty is causing a lot of anxiety about many different areas of life.
It’s time to get FREE of anxiety and fear so we can enjoy the Goodness of God! 🙂
Fear is afraid of you – did you know that?
How to Remove Blocks to Hearing God
A lot of people ask me how they can see or hear from God more clearly. It’s a common desire among those who are earnestly seeking God. Many people find this blog by searching for “how to see in the spirit”. Seeing and hearing from God are closely related – so after the last post, “Why Can’t I See or Hear in the Spirit?“, I thought this might be helpful to explore.
Many of us believe things about God that are simply not true. We don’t even realize it! If we did, we would stop believing those things, right? We often believe things unconsciously that are deeply affecting our ability to hear from God and see in the Spirit.
So how do we find these things?
Several years ago the Lord gave me a little heart exercise called the Lie Detector. It really helps you work with Holy Spirit to uncover and remove anything you believe that’s not true (which we call lies).
Lie Detector: God Concept
Go to a place where you will not be interrupted. Turn off any devices that might distract you. Take a few deep breaths, letting them out slowly to help you relax and to quiet your mind.
Say these statements/questions out loud and then wait for an answer. An answer may come as a feeling, a thought, a picture in your mind, a word, a memory or just an inner knowing. You can do this alone or with a friend. If no answer comes to the first question – this may not be the right time for this process.
“Spirit of Truth, is there a lie I believe about God?” (pause and wait for an answer)
“I release myself from the lie that says _(the lie)_. I give it up and let it go.”
“Who taught me that lie?” (pause and wait for an answer)
“I forgive _(name)_ for teaching me that lie.”
“What truth do I need to hear?” (pause and wait for an answer)
“I receive the truth that _(the truth)_.
Note: For those who perceive God as a Trinity, it may be helpful to break down this step and ask, “Spirit of Truth, is there a lie I believe about the Father?”. Then after completing the step, ask the question again separately for Jesus and then for the Holy Spirit. People have reported some amazing experiences when they have tried this. 😍
As you do this exercise, you may discover that the answer to “Who taught me that lie?” is YOU! We often come to faulty conclusions about God from our life experiences. For instance, if someone close to you passed away when you were a child, a well meaning adult might have said, “God needed your grandma so He took her to heaven.” If you really miss your grandma, then you might get angry at God for “taking her” away from you. It makes God a bad guy in your little hurting heart. See how that works?
When bad things happen in nature (i.e. hurricanes, tsunamis, tornadoes, etc.), what do we call them? Acts of God. That’s another way we can get the idea that God is a bad guy – kind of big and scary, right?
So there are lots of ways we might have unconsciously decided that God is not good or trustworthy. Even if you had a religious upbringing, most people don’t have a solid, heart-felt knowledge of God’s goodness.
If you don’t really believe God is good and that He loves you unconditionally, then guess what? You don’t really WANT to hear from Him. You might feel kind of “cautious” because you’re not sure you are going to like what He says. Part of you might say, “Yes, I want to hear from God and see in the Spirit!” but another part, deep inside your heart might think, “But what if I don’t like it? Or I can’t handle it? What if God is kind of scary?”
This Lie Detector exercise can help get to the deeper part of our hearts. I’ve done this exercise over and over and it has helped me SO much! In fact, I encourage you to write down the answer you get to the last question, “What truth do I need to hear?” Put it on a post-it note where you can look at it each day. Meditate on it. Say it out loud to yourself. Really let it soak in – it might take awhile for it to become your new default way of perceiving God (especially if that lie was in there a long time). The more you embrace the truth, the easier it will be to see in the Spirit and hear God more clearly. I promise.
I hope this has been helpful to you today. Feel free to comment below what experience you have when you try this exercise. I’ve used this exercise with many people, even people who tell me, “I can’t hear from God.” and they always get an answer to the questions. It works!
Why Can’t I See or Hear in the Spirit?
A few years ago I was asked to intercede for a meeting at church while the speaker was presenting – the speaker was a friend of mine and she felt she needed “extra prayer” for this meeting, especially for people’s hearts to be open to receive God’s love for inner healing. As I prayed with another intercessor in a small side room away from the meeting, we saw “in the spirit” the room full of people listening and they all had helmets on their heads. I asked the Lord about the helmets because it was clear that these helmets were preventing them from seeing or hearing what was being said. They were solid black motorcycle helmets. What He showed me was that it was unbelief in His goodness – and we needed to pray for these helmets to be removed. We did pray for that and it was amazing how He showed up to heal people! Their hearts opened to Him and His love was tangibly felt by many – we were so happy! 😍
Later I asked for more insight about these helmets and how they affected our lives. Here is what I received.
The Helmet of Unbelief prevents you from perceiving truth, especially the truth of the unseen spiritual realm. It prevents you from experiencing Truth – Truth is a Person (Jesus). You cannot hear Him, see Him, feel His touch, smell Him or taste His goodness. You cannot know Him intimately. Your senses are clouded; you feel dull and foggy. It is like wearing a motorcycle helmet with a solid black face screen – you can’t see anything and you can’t hear clearly (aka Deaf & Dumb spirit). I’ve experienced this, have you?
You can see a little bit sometimes, but not clearly. Being able to see and hear a little bit makes you think you can see & hear clearly because you don’t know any better. You think it’s “normal” – the way you see and hear is all you know.
The Helmet of Unbelief is “orphan thinking” – it is the helmet of victimization. Stubbornness, Pride and Independence fueled by Fear and Self-Rejection keeps the Helmet of Unbelief on. We don’t want to walk by faith – we want to see FIRST and then choose to believe. It’s not until you choose to ACT to trust Him – then you can ask for grace to remove the Helmet of Unbelief. It’s an act of faith – you do it BEFORE you can see and you are rewarded with sight. 😃
Having an encounter with God gives you a glimpse of how good life can be WITHOUT the Helmet of Unbelief. You become dissatisfied – you don’t want to go back to your “normal” life. You don’t want to settle for less – now you want MORE.
Hearing someone’s testimony of God’s goodness in their life confronts the unbelief in us. If He did it for them – He could do it for me too! You may have experienced God’s goodness in a way that I have not yet experienced it. By sharing your story with me, it gives me faith.
What can we do? Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal areas of unbelief in our hearts and how to remove them. Ask Holy Spirit to show you what it looks like in YOUR life.
You can CHOOSE what to think. That’s free will. That’s why “repent” means to change the way you think. We are not in control of many things, but we CAN choose what we think, what we believe. Which helmet are you wearing – the Helmet of Salvation or the Helmet of Unbelief? 😊 The choice is yours!
If you have any insight to add to this, please feel free to comment below. I share these things on this blog so we can have a conversation and each learn from each other. We all see in part so when we each bring our “part”, it makes a fuller picture (like a jigsaw puzzle). Do you have something you’d like to add? I’d love to hear it! 😃
Here are two more specific ways to help you remove the Helmet of Unbelief:
How to Remove Blocks to Hearing God
Walking by Faith – Amy’s story
Here’s an example of what it means to follow Jesus.
Amy works at Best Buy, an electronics store chain. She used to work in real estate selling homes several years ago, but took a break after she had a car accident. During her recovery, her husband suddenly died of a heart attack. Without her husband’s financial support, she needed a job – fast. She felt drawn to work at Best Buy and did very well there – she became a “pastor” to the people she worked with and often had opportunities to pray for them and help them find hope. This job provided a much needed sense of stability to the sudden roller coaster of her life. She’s been there for almost three years now.
A few weeks ago, she began to feel the Lord directing her to go back into real estate. She was a little hesitant because it had been so long and she was used to getting a regular paycheck from Best Buy. It would take her out of her comfort zone. She told the Lord, “If you give me a listing to sell a house, I’ll resign.” Someone called her and asked her to list their home for $650,000 (USD).
However she still had doubts. What if she didn’t get any more listings? What if she couldn’t pay her rent? A friend in real estate told her that right now is a seller’s market which means it is hard to find properties that are for sale (new listings). Plenty of buyers, but very few people are selling. This discouraged her and made her wonder if she really should quit her dependable job.
As she pondered it, it dawned on her that with just 2 real estate listings she could make as much as she made all year with Best Buy! This gave her courage to step out. So she said, “Yes, Lord, I am willing. I will turn in my resignation tomorrow.” That night a woman she knew called her at 1:30am. The woman had been looking at a particular house she wanted and it was suddenly listed as available for sale. She asked Amy to write a contract for that house immediately – at 2am she completed the contract and sent it in.
The next morning the agent that had listed the house was shocked. Who writes contracts at 2am? She had to find out so she called her. Amy explained how much this woman wanted THAT particular house and had contacted her in the middle of the night. The agent explained that she had only listed the house for a few minutes last night and that the house was not available right now. However she said she would talk to the owner and get back to her. Within a few hours, she called back and said, “We’re not going to list the house to the public, but we ARE going to work with you and the buyer who really wants this house.”
That was the listing she needed. Praise God!
That morning she went to Best Buy and turned in her resignation, giving them a two week notice. Two days later a coworker invited her to lunch with some friends of his (a couple). She had met these friends at a previous event and felt prompted to go. They had a nice lunch and she went back to work. A few hours later, the woman called and said, “We are moving out of our condo and we want to buy a house. We want you handle the real estate transactions for both properties.”
That was a third listing! And she would represent them in a fourth listing when they bought a new house!
But wait, it gets even better. 😃
She wanted to have her own office, but did not have the means to rent a place. A lot of agents work from their homes, but she knew with family obligations, she would prefer to have a space to focus just on business.
The next day, a business associate from her past called her. He said he was having a lot of trouble doing business in his country due to COVID-19. He asked her if they could build a partnership where he could do business in a city near her and she would represent him. He told her, “Find an office we can use and I’ll pay half of all the expenses.”
Yes! In less than 1 week, she got three new real estate listings and she now had the means to get her own office! She also would have even MORE business as she partnered with this colleague who would send her clients who were looking for real estate in her area.
She said, “I had been waiting on God, but as I stepped out to walk by faith, I felt like He had been waiting on me! He had all these people lined up, ready to bless me with business – and here I was afraid to step out. He is a good, good Father.”
This is an example of what it means to follow Jesus – to step out in faith, obeying the prompting in your heart from the Lord, even when you have no idea how it will work out. It means taking the risk that God is who He said He is and that His plans for you are always good. ❤
Do you have a story like this that you’d like to share? Please post it in the comments! Or you can write a guest post for this blog. We’d love to hear from you. 🙂
Life After Death Shared Experience – Husband and Wife ❤
Many people describe near death experiences – this is the first one I’ve read that had a husband and wife who died together, but one of them came back. Can you imagine what that must be like?
Jeff Olsen: The accident happened while we were driving back to our home in Bountiful, Utah, from a visit to relatives in the southern part of the state. My wife, Tamara, was asleep beside me. Our seven-year-old son, Spencer, was in the back seat, playing with his toys. Our toddler, Griffin, slept in his car seat. The road stretched out ahead, and my eyes grew heavy. It felt as if I’d blinked for just a second.
That was all it took.
I lost control. The car rolled, windows exploding, gravel flying, as we spun over and over until I lost consciousness. I woke only for a second after we stopped. I felt horrible pain and heard Spencer crying in the backseat. Everything went black again. I was terrified. Where is my family? Are they safe?
Then, suddenly, I was calm. The pain was gone. I looked around. I was floating above our car accident. Before I could react, I felt a presence near me. It was Tamara. We were encircled in a bubble of light that was emanating complete peace. I knew then she was gone, but it was as if my grief were suspended. All I could feel was serenity. I wondered if we were on our way to heaven.
Tamara looked at me, her face serious. “Jeff, you cannot be here,” she said. “You have to go back.” How could I? She was here. Then I remembered Spencer’s cries. He was still alive. He needed me. I knew I had to make a choice. I pulled Tamara close to me. “Goodbye,” I said. I let go. Then I felt myself drifting away from Tamara and the comforting light.
Suddenly, I was in a hospital. I was not yet back in my body—I was still weightless, without pain. I moved freely through the halls, observing the people around me. Somehow, I was able to see their whole lives as I looked at them. Their stories, their fears, their experiences. I felt no judgment toward any of them. I was filled with the most incredible love and oneness with each of them.
I finally reached a room and stopped. The patient was in terrible shape, and doctors were rushing around him. Wait, I thought. Is that me? I recognized my own face now. I was horrified. I couldn’t go back to that! Then I remembered what Tamara had said. I thought of Spencer. I couldn’t leave him alone.
I let go and chose to move toward the body. The heaviness was the first thing I noticed, then came the horrific pain. But the worst part was the guilt. It hit me like a tidal wave. Tamara and Griffin were gone. Even as I sensed the doctors over me, working furiously to save my life, the only thing I could think was: This was my fault.
Dr. Jeff O’Driscoll was finishing his rounds at the hospital when Rachel, an ER nurse, grabbed his arm. “Come see this,” she said. “His wife is…here.”
Dr. O’Driscoll: Rachel and I stood in the doorway. The room was loud. A team of doctors worked to stabilize the patient. As I watched, the sounds around me faded out. I sensed a divine presence in the room. And then I noticed a light. In it was the form of a woman, floating above the patient’s bed. She had flowing, curly blonde hair and was dressed in various shades of white. Her form was almost transparent, and the look on her face was serene. She looked vibrant, otherworldly—I knew innately that this was the man’s wife. The divine presence in the room was allowing me to view her eternal soul.
She smiled at me, as if she’d known me forever. I sensed her immense gratitude toward the doctors who were working to save her husband. She looked directly at me and back at her husband, then back at me. Her eyes were intent.
Then everything slowly returned to normal. I could hear the doctors speaking, and I could hear Rachel again. “Did you see her too?” she asked. I looked again. The patient’s wife was gone. The trauma surgeon took the man to surgery.
Olsen: After a few months and 18 surgeries, I finally moved to the rehab wing. One night, just days before my release, I fell into a deep sleep and had a dream that was more powerful than any I’d ever had. I was standing in a big field. The serenity I’d felt in the bubble of light on the day of the accident returned. My body was healed, and I could walk freely. I felt light and started running. I noticed a corridor appear on my left. I entered and followed it to the end. I found Griffin there, asleep in his crib. He looked perfect. Tears filled my eyes as I picked him up and held him close. I could feel his breath on my neck as I rocked him. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself, I thought.
Then I felt a divine presence behind me. It exuded pure love. It felt like the love I’d experienced for the people in the hospital the day of the accident, free of judgment. I now understood that I’d been shown a glimpse of the kind of complete love that God had for me. I felt two arms wrap around Griffin and me, enveloping us. A reassuring voice said, “There’s nothing to forgive.”
This is an excerpt of a story that appeared in Mysterious Ways magazine – click here for the full story
For more information, I highly recommend the book Imagine Heaven by John Burke. It really encouraged me after someone close to me unexpectedly passed away. It is full of stories like this and it examines the details of these experiences in light of what the Scriptures say. Click on the book cover below to see the description on Amazon.
Symptoms of a Bad Soul Tie (& what to do about it)
Symptoms of an unhealthy soul tie:
- You feel DRAINED by your connection to the other person. You give, they take and take and take.
- You feel especially VULNERABLE to the other person’s opinion, either good or bad.
- You don’t feel confident without their support. You are afraid of being abandoned by them.
- You don’t feel free to express who you really are – you HIDE your true self or you let them dictate your decisions.
- You are not able to express a different opinion – if you do, there’s a LOT of tension between you.
- You are unable to make decisions on your own – if you do and they do not agree, there’s a lot of PRESSURE to conform to their expectations.
- You feel emotionally tied to the other person even when you do not want to be.
- You can’t stop thinking about the person even though the relationship is over.
- You have an emotional reaction that is unpleasant when someone mentions their name or if you run into the other person unexpectedly.
- You feel like you can’t move on with your life; you feel tied to the past with the other person.
Can you have both an unhealthy soul tie and a healthy soul tie with the same person?
Yes, you can. Breaking the unhealthy soul tie can bring freedom to the relationship so that it becomes stronger and healthier for both of you. When we become intimate with someone – whether emotionally or physically – we build a bond with that person (a soul tie). A healthy soul tie enhances your life – you draw strength from the connection. Unhealthy soul ties have a negative effect on your life. You feel tied to someone in a way that sometimes pulls you down or holds you back, even if the person has passed away or is no longer in your life.
Some of the benefits of breaking an unhealthy soul tie are:
- You no longer feel drained by the connection to the other person.
- You experience inner peace (instead of turmoil over what they may think about you).
- You feel free to express who you really are.
- You are free to have your own opinions.
- You can make decisions that are best for you, without the pressure to conform to someone else’s expectations.
- You no longer feel emotionally dependent on the other person in an unhealthy way.
- You are able to move on with your life (if the relationship is over or the person has passed away).
Some people have expressed concerns about what will happen when they break an unhealthy soul tie with someone in their life. Will it damage the relationship? No, but it will change the way the two of you interact. If someone has been very controlling toward you, they may notice the shift in the way you respond to them. They may not like it, but it will be healthier for both of you in the long run. Overall, the benefits far outweigh the discomfort you may initially feel. A healthy relationship can only come from two people who are free to be themselves. Breaking an unhealthy soul tie gives you that freedom.
You might encounter some obstacles as you consider whether you are ready to break an unhealthy soul tie with someone. You might not be ready to let go or you may be afraid to lose the connection with the other person. Being ready to let go is a personal choice –you have to decide when it is the right time for you. Breaking an unhealthy soul tie will not damage the healthy soul tie you have – you won’t lose the connection you have. It will be stronger and clearer instead.
What obstacles might keep you from breaking an unhealthy soul-tie?
– you are afraid to lose the connection with the other person
– you are not ready to let go
– you feel responsible to make the other person happy (co-dependence)
– you feel guilty for wanting to be free to make your own decisions and have your own opinions
– you are afraid it will hurt the other person’s feelings or damage the relationship
– you are afraid of the other person’s reactions (retaliation, manipulation, etc.)
– you don’t know what life will be like on your own
Breaking an unhealthy soul tie can be emotional. It can feel like you are losing someone. But it is also very freeing. Some have remarked that it was like a pressure valve being released and they could finally relax. One person said they felt like the umbilical cord had finally been cut between them and their mother and they could now make their own decisions freely. A healthy sense of independence can be experienced when a soul tie is cut. You are finally free to be who you are meant to be – without the constant pressure to meet someone else’s expectations of you.
What are the signs of a healthy soul-tie?
– you feel strengthened by your connection to the other person
– you feel comforted by the other person’s support
– you feel more confident
– you experience a greater sense of well being
– you feel free to express who you really are in the relationship
– you are able to express a different opinion without fear of damaging the relationship
– you make decisions without feeling pressured to meet the other’s expectations
– you feel free to grow and become your best self
If you want to break an unhealthy soul-tie, you can do so today. You formed the soul-tie through your choices – through an act of your will. Therefore, you can now break the soul-tie, if you wish, also through an act of your will.
The Step: Soul Ties can help you determine if any unhealthy soul ties are holding you back.
Step: Soul Ties
Go to a place where you will not be interrupted. Take a few deep breaths, letting them out slowly to help you relax and to quiet your mind.
Say these statements/questions out loud and then wait for an answer. An answer may come as a feeling, a thought, a picture in your mind, a word, a memory or just an inner knowing. You can do this alone or with a friend. If no answer comes to the first question, this may not be the right time for this step. You can come back to this at another time.
“Spirit of Truth, is there anyone I have an unhealthy soul tie with? (pause and wait for an answer)
“Is there anything I need to forgive this person for?” (pause and wait for an answer)
Focus on an image in your mind of this person and say out loud, “I forgive you for __________________. I release you from the harm you caused me. I let it go.” (pause, release any emotions that come up)
Then say, “I break the unhealthy soul tie between me and you. I send back any part of your soul that I have kept and I take back to myself any part of me that you kept. I release myself of this connection in my soul. God, please restore my connection with You in this area of my soul.”
Take deep cleansing breaths – opening your heart to receive God’s Love. ❤
Forgiveness is an important part of breaking an unhealthy soul tie. If you are holding a grudge against someone, it ties you to them emotionally. If you try to break the soul tie, but you don’t forgive them, you won’t be able to break the power they have over your life. You’ll still feel connected to them, even if that person is someone you’d rather forget. If you need help choosing to forgive (you know you need to, but you are having trouble), here’s a helpful article (look for the PDF download).
To learn more about Soul Ties, you can read this post: Human Soul Ties
Excerpt from Freedom through Forgiveness: The Power of Forgiveness Can Change Your Life, Second Edition © 2012. Reprinted with the author’s permission.