Category Archives: Holy Spirit
How I Met God ♥
Today is a very special day to me. On October 8, 1980, I started my relationship with God.
I had heard of God and his Son, Jesus. But I didn’t really know much about them personally. I had heard some stories from the Bible and I had even memorized a few Scriptures. I attended a private Christian school and memorizing Bible verses was sometimes required for homework. I did it because it was homework, not because I had any interest in religion.
My family was not religious. We attended my grandmother’s small country church once or twice a year as part of a family tradition – usually just for Christmas and Easter. Most of my classmates at school were from religious homes where they attended church every week and went to Bible camp during the summers. But not me. I was different.
October 8 was a normal Wednesday. I got ready for school as usual. I made it to home room on time and went to my first two classes. Then we went to chapel, a weekly “class” that everyone attended. Our entire junior and senior high went to the same service – about 150 kids. The younger children in elementary school had a separate service, geared to their age group. I had attended this school since first grade and had been to many, many chapel services.
I sat in chapel that day with all the other 8th grade girls. Boys had “cooties” so we didn’t sit with them. I recall that we were seated near the back of the chapel, far from the front where the action was.
We sang some songs, among them “Onward Christian Soldiers”. A guest minister got up to speak. I don’t recall a word he said. Toward the end of the service, he started the altar call. That’s when a minister asks the listeners to respond to his message. I don’t know what he said, but it was effective. The last girl on our row began to cry. Her two best girlfriends were sitting next to her and they tried to comfort her. She got up and went to the front to pray with the minister, to respond to his invitation. Her friends went with her along with the girl sitting closest to them. There were only 3 of us left sitting on the pew. I turned to the girl next to me, we shrugged our shoulders and decided to follow the others. It seemed like “the right thing to do”.
By the time we got to the front of the chapel, we saw that the place for prayer (the altar) was really crowded – many other kids had also responded to the minister’s call. One of the girls saw an empty space behind the pulpit on the left side, so we all walked up the stairs to the platform and gathered in a circle on the dark red carpeted floor. I was hoping we weren’t going to get in trouble as normally no one was allowed up there but the adults.
I joined my friends, not really sure what to do. I was there for moral support. I had never been to an altar before – what was expected?
Soon the minister came to us and said, “Girls, would you like to give your lives to God?” Several of the “church girls” immediately nodded. They had all been to a youth retreat a few weeks prior where they all got “saved” again. It seemed that perhaps they had backslidden and needed to “fix” things with God. I didn’t really know what the man was asking, but I didn’t want to stand out – so I didn’t ask any questions. I remember that I glanced at the ceiling and thought, “Do I believe in God?” My heart answered, “Yes.” So I decided that meant I could pray with the minister.
He led us all in a prayer where we repeated some statements after him, as though we were talking to God. I had never prayed before – well, except that in elementary school we all recited a prayer before we went to the lunchroom each day. But that was different.
I don’t remember a word of what I said. I didn’t feel anything. No bright lights or a voice from heaven. I just “prayed the prayer” because someone asked me – and I didn’t want to be the only one who didn’t do it. When I looked around the room after the prayer, I noticed that the entire student body was on their knees praying – except for 2 boys in the senior class. They were surrounded by a few teachers who were talking to them – the boys kept shaking their heads “No”. I was amazed that they refused to open their hearts to God that day as everyone else in the place definitely was. I remember seeing even the “tough” boys in our class lined up at a nearby pew, on their knees, praying with the minister. That’s how real God was in that place.
Later that night, I spoke to God on my own. I had heard a few weeks earlier that you should talk to God every day. I remember thinking, “Then He should talk back to me then.” I was kind of cynical, even at that age.
Me, 1980-81
The next day, as I was walking into the girl’s locker room, I said a swear word. Immediately, I heard a voice in my heart say, “You’re a Christian now. Christians don’t talk like that.”
I stopped walking. I knew that wasn’t my voice talking to me because I would not have thought of that. I remembered being told that after you decide to give your life to God and ask Jesus into your heart – He actually sends His Spirit to live inside of you. Hearing this voice and feeling the conviction that went with it, I realized, “This must be the Holy Spirit. I better obey.” And from that day on, I stopped swearing.
It’s funny how, when looking back, I see how “non-eventful” this experience appeared to be at the time. It was a normal Wednesday morning. I was in chapel, as I had been hundreds of times before. Yet on this day, something changed. Someone asked me to open my heart and life to God’s love. And I did. Not because I understood it. Peer pressure “saved” me. I didn’t want to be left out.
Since that time, I can honestly say that it was the BEST DECISION I have ever made in my entire life. From that first day, I started talking to God every night before bed and I have never stopped. He is the air I breathe. He is my hope, my peace, my joy and my strength. My life is SO MUCH BETTER because I decided to open my heart to Him.
Thank You, Jesus, for saving me as a young girl when I didn’t even know what I was doing. Thank You for being there through everything – my parent’s divorce, my boyfriends and my break-ups, my high school and college years, my first marriage and divorce, my time away from home and my time returning to my roots … and all the other times when I needed a friend, a confidante, a savior to get me out of myself and learn how to love others, really love others.
I love what You’ve done with my life. It is so exciting to see where we are going next. I never know what You have up Your sleeve – like the wonderful surprise of my new husband and what a pleasure it is to be married to him. I never saw that coming! And the life You’ve given me, allowing me to help others by sharing the pain and challenges I’ve overcome.
I am so incredibly thankful today. Thank you, dear readers, for celebrating this day with me.
I hope that if you are reading this and you have not yet opened your heart to God, that perhaps you will. Would you like to? It’s not hard. It’s just a choice – to choose to follow Jesus and learn how to love others, to respond to God’s love for you as His child. And guess what? He DOES talk back when you talk to Him! 🙂
If you’d like to do that, you can pray this prayer or something similar. You can use your own words, if you prefer.
“God, I am willing – I open my heart to Your Love. I give You my life. Jesus, please come and save me. I need Your help. I’m sorry for the things I’ve done wrong. Please teach me how to receive Your love so I can love others. Thank you.”
If you’ve never prayed that kind of prayer, please do. It will open up a world of goodness you cannot even imagine. There is so much peace and joy and love just waiting to come to you, if you open yourself up to it. Words fail me how much better my life is because of God’s love. It does not prevent bad things from happening to you – instead it gives you an inner resilience and a peace that passes understanding.
If you prayed this for the first time just now – then please let me know. Either post something below or send me an email: kingdomwalker2 (at) gmail (dot) com. I would love to celebrate with YOU and help you in your new relationship with God just as others helped me when I first started out.
God bless you today! ♥
The chapel today
Holy Ghost Movie – FREE until Monday night (9/8/2014)
Hey, Movie Watchers, have you seen the new film “Holy Ghost”? It’s pretty “out there” for most people. It’s definitely challenging – most people don’t know how to describe the Holy Spirit (or Holy Ghost) much less make a movie about Him. If this topic intrigues you, you might enjoy this film. It’s not a dry documentary. It’s one man’s passion to find God actually engaging with everyday people. It’s worth watching, in my opinion.
And the best part? It’s free to watch today and tomorrow if you go to this link: http://holyghost.wpfilm.com/
Offer expires Monday night, 9/8/2014 at 5pm PST or 8pm CST.
Enjoy!
Sons of God movie
I just watched the movie Sons of God. Wow – it really makes you think. It’s very inspiring.
Here’s the link to watch it: https://vimeo.com/ondemand/sonsofgod. It’s only $5 to rent – support the guy, he’s an independent film creator!
Here’s the trailer to give you a taste of it.
If you can’t afford to rent it, I think he still gives away free viewings here: https://www.dutchquest.com/film/
Cultivating Closeness
I have been feeling drawn … closer. Closer to God, closer to an awareness of His nearness. I feel a greater need to “pay attention” to God’s Spirit, follow more closely, don’t get distracted.
It is SO easy to get distracted in this digital world – so much vies for our attention. There’s so much “mental noise” trying to drown out the still, small voice of the Lord.
However, I sense that there is coming a time when those who can follow closely will be dearly needed – and they will be few and far between. I remember hearing stories of the USSR when it was under communist rule. The Christians had to follow the Holy Spirit very closely. They were not allowed to meet in a church or in a public place to worship. They became the underground church. They would meet secretly in people’s homes to worship and pray together. They did not send out invitations – that would have been dangerous. Instead they listened to the Holy Spirit. I remember hearing the stories how people would individually feel drawn to a specific person’s house. When they arrived, they would find others who had been drawn. Throughout the evening, people would arrive one by one. No one had “called” a meeting – the Holy Spirit led them. This way the secret police could never discover their plans … because they HAD NO PLANS. It was too dangerous to plan a gathering. Once they arrived, they worshipped, prayed and enjoyed God’s presence together.
I hope things don’t get as bad as they once were in the USSR. But there may be other situations where being sensitive to His leading will be life saving. I want to be ready. Now is the time to be “practicing” so that when the time comes when you are dearly needed, you will be ready.
Press in!
The Holy She
Have you ever contemplated the feminine side of God? I have often heard of the “Father heart of God”. There are many Bible verses that refer to God being a Father, especially the words of Jesus in the book of John. But not many direct references to God’s Mother heart. I’ve never heard anyone teach on this, have you?
But it is obviously part of God’s nature.
Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Genesis 1:26-27 NKJV
We see the image of God reflected in both genders – male and female. So who is the Mother heart of God? What is the “Holy She” like?
There’s a lot of discussion on the “Divine Mother”. Some refer to Her by different names. I see Her most closely reflected in the description of the Holy Spirit. It was She who inspired Jesus to say,
“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the one who kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to her! How often I wanted to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!” Matt 23:37 NKJV
A hen is a female chicken and gathering chicks is definitely a motherly thing to do.
In the Old Testament scriptures, the word for the Holy Spirit is Ruach. 90% of the times this word is used in scripture, it is used in the feminine form. Did the Old Testament writers have an intuitive sense of God’s Mother nature that we have somehow lost in modern times?
The most common symbol for the Holy Spirit is a dove. A dove is a feminine symbol. (I don’t know too many men who would choose the dove as the symbol of their masculinity!) A dove is gentle. King Solomon refered to his beloved in the Song of Solomon as a dove (SS 2:4). The Holy Spirit was seen descending on Jesus as a dove (Matt 3:16).
The Holy Spirit is described as a helper, a teacher, someone who guides us into all truth and one who comforts us. Those are all descriptions of the typical job of a mother with her young. She also teaches them right from wrong – as the Holy Spirit does when convicting the world of sin, righteousness and judgement (John 14 & 16).
I recently had an encounter with this Holy She. It blew my mind. I had never really thought about the Mother Heart of God. But SHE wanted me to know Her. And I am so glad She came to me and showed me Her heart for me.
It was very deep and very personal. It healed my heart in places I’d never been able to discover before. I knew something was missing. I knew my heart felt heavy. But I had no idea what was missing. I didn’t know I needed a revelation of the Mother Heart of God.
There were areas in my heart and soul where I had not received the gentleness and kindness that only a mother can give to a child. I did not realize how much this had affected my perspective of life. I was radically changed, permanently changed, after this encounter with Her. It was simply amazing. I don’t even know how to describe what it was like other than to say I encountered my Heavenly Mother and She loves me! ♥ She welcomed me to the family. 🙂
So I’m posting this in hopes that if anyone else has this experience and doesn’t know how to fit it into their spiritual understanding, perhaps my testimony will light their way. It is NOT sacrilegious to recognize God’s feminine side (though I’m sure there are male ministers who would be offended or befuddled by referring to God as She).
God is recognized as the Giver of Life. On the earth, that is the job of women – they are the ones who bring forth new life from their wombs.
The name God gave to Abraham when He first revealed Himself and told Abraham he would become a great nation is the name El Shaddai. There are various discussion as to the meaning of this name. One is this:
El – might, strength, power; it was the common term for “God” in that culture
Shad – breast, nourisher, sustainer
dai – enough, sufficient, supply
So it could be that when God revealed Him/Herself to Abraham, He/She said, “You will become a great nation (i.e. you will have a lot of children & grandchildren) and I will be the Powerful Breasted-One who will supply all your needs.” Kind of makes sense – the feminine side of God proclaiming a promise of many children and grandchildren and presenting the image of a breast that will nourish and sustain the children who are coming.
What do you think? Have you experienced this Holy She? I think many people long for a sympathetic Mother who will comfort them. Someone who will heal their hearts with Her Love and guide them in the way they should go. I know I certainly need that. Don’t you?
You asked to know ahead of time ….
Rating: Educational
This is funny. Ironic really. So many times I have heard people groan in frustration, “I just wish I knew what was coming! I wish I knew what the next step was or what to expect! I feel so frustrated not knowing what to do next. Aargh!”
When we follow the leading of the Spirit, or try to listen to our intuition to guide us, it often feels that way. We are listening, stretching our inner being, waiting for a signal, a sign, something to help us find our way. We often have no idea what to expect. We just keep plodding along, step by step, hoping there’s some direction in the seemingly randomness of our life experiences.
In fact, I’ve heard people reply to this frustration with, “God doesn’t tell you ahead of time what is coming because if you knew, you’d run the other way!”
Or others have said of themselves, “I’m glad I don’t know ahead of time because if I did I’d run ahead and probably mess it up.”
Lots of rationalizations to help us deal with the frustration.
However, I have always wished I knew what was coming ahead of time. I’m sure I’ve asked that question a million times, “What’s next, Lord?” And I’ve expressed my share of frustration over this issue.
Well, guess what? Now, I’ve experienced the flip side of this and it is just as frustrating. Let me explain.
For several weeks now I have felt this inner nudging that I need to call a certain person. I wrote it down as a note to myself. I rehearsed the dialog in my mind – what am I going to say? What do I need to tell them? How will they respond? I’ve done this several times over the last few weeks.
And yet, I cannot find it within myself to make that call. I don’t know why.
I’ve wrestled with – Why can’t I call them? It’s not a big deal. They are a friendly sort of person. I haven’t talked to them in awhile, but that’s not a big deal. The conversation should be pleasant.
Funny, isn’t it?
And then this morning, it dawned on me. It’s not time yet! I don’t know how I knew this, I just “knew”. I felt it inside. I AM supposed to call this person, but just not yet. That’s why I can’t seem to make myself do it. It seemed completely irrational, yet now I understand.
So, to me this is rather ironic. We often wish we knew what the next step was on our path and we get frustrated waiting and wondering what’s next. And yet, when I received the next step ahead of time, it was frustrating for me. I didn’t realize that it wasn’t time yet. I felt this nudge to do it, but I didn’t have the means to accomplish it.
Great insight. Now, I know. If you get a sense of direction, but you feel blocked, then just wait for the right timing.
It’s funny because yesterday when I was trying to figure out what to do next, I literally felt an arm holding me back. It felt like when you are kid and your parent puts an arm across the top of your chest from behind, holding you from going forward. It puzzled me. I felt safe, but I couldn’t move forward. Now, I’m beginning to understand.
Finding your way in the unseen realm is uncertain because you can’t SEE anything. I go mainly by feeling things (i.e. peace or no peace). Sometimes I get an inner “knowing”. Rarely do I get a “sign” or something that’s real obvious. And yet, looking back, things seem to be orchestrated beautifully.
Well, I learned my lesson today. It might help others, so I decided to post it. I’m beginning to get the idea that some things are orchestrated for us and other things are up to us. Wisdom is figuring out which is which. 🙂
Feel free to comment – What are your thoughts on getting direction?
Attracting the Holy Spirit
Rating: Inspirational, pleasant
Humility attracts the Holy Spirit. – Mickey Robinson
God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. – Solomon, James & Peter (Prov 3:34, James 4:6, I Peter 5:5)
What is grace? One definition I like is “God’s enabling power”. So how does this power come to us? By the Holy Spirit. “…you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you …” (Acts 1:8)
Recognizing your dependence upon God and your need of Him makes you humble. That draws the Holy Spirit TO YOU.
When you feel confident you can “handle” life on your own, God will resist you. His Spirit won’t help you because you don’t seem to need Him.
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven.” (Matt 19:14) Little children are humble and dependent. They know they need help – tying their shoes, getting a drink, feeding themselves, getting dressed, etc. So they ask, every time they need something. Admitting their weakness allows someone with strength to help them.
Most of us, as adults, want to show we are strong, that we can “handle” whatever life throws at us. But the opposite attitude is needed if we wish to receive God’s enabling power by His Holy Spirit. We must humble ourselves every day, saying, like Moses did, “If Your Presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here.” (Exodus 33:15)
Admitting that we don’t “have it all together” is a vulnerable place for us. We’ve been told to “grow up” and be responsible for our lives. Yet, it seems to me that the complexities of life are meant to drive us to this place of vulnerability and trust in His grace.
So, here’s some questions to ponder :
How much do you want to do on your own?
and
How desperate are you for His help?
The choice is yours.
I’d rather choose vulnerability, grace and humility daily. I don’t want to do this on my own. I want more of the Holy Spirit’s help and enabling power. The world is too big and scary – just look at the news each day. We need help. Our planet desperately needs His grace.
Make us humble, Lord, that we might receive Your enabling power by Your Spirit. Without it, we’re lost. ♥
Divine Communion
A. W. Tozer was a man who perceived God in the unseen realm. The words he used to express his relationship with God have often resonated with me. On some deep level, I “get” it. Here are some of my favorite lines from Tozer’s book, The Pursuit of God.
“To have found God and still to pursue Him is the soul’s paradox of love …”
“In God we shall find that for which we have all our lives been secretly longing.”
“God formed us for His pleasure, and so formed us that we, as well as He, can, in divine communion, enjoy the sweet and mysterious mingling of kindred personalities. He meant us to see Him and live with Him and draw our life from His smile.”
“A spiritual kingdom lies all about us, enclosing us, embracing us, altogether within reach of our inner selves, waiting for us to recognize it. God Himself is here waiting our response to His presence. This eternal world will come alive to us the moment we begin to reckon upon its reality.”
Doesn’t this resonate with you? Doesn’t something within tell you that there’s MORE than you are currently experiencing with your 5 senses? These words of Tozer have inspired me for years.
In the beginning of his book, it says this:
“Others before me have gone much farther into these holy mysteries than I have done, but if my fire is not large it is yet real, and there may be those who can light their candle at its flame.”
Thank you, A.W., for lighting my candle. I hope I can do the same for others. God is real – I love experiencing His presence and His nearness. Don’t you?
Elements of the Unseen Realm
Rating: Educational
So what’s in the Unseen Realm? There are quite a few things. Perceiving them varies depending on the situation and your ability to discern them. Obviously, we need to rely on the Holy Spirit to show us what is there and why.
Here’s what I think of when I think of the Unseen Realm.
Elements of the Unseen Realm
God the Father
Jesus
The Holy Spirit
Angels – guardian angels, warrior angels, worship angels, healing angels, etc.
Demons – evil spirits of every kind (i.e. unclean spirit, lying spirit, spirit of adultery, spirit of fear, etc.)
Powers – both good and evil ones
Principalities – both good and evil ones
Human spirits
Human souls
Soul-ties
Anointings, Giftings, Callings, Mantles, Spheres of authority
Blessings – current blessings or generational blessings
Curses or assignments – current curses (like a word curse) or generational curses from the past
Objects like listening devices, tracking devices, a sword, a scepter, a crown, armor or clothes, etc.
Structures like portals, doors, windows, etc from this realm to another one
Locations like Sheol, the Second Heaven, the Third Heaven, the Throne Room, etc.
Beings in heaven like the four living creatures, seraphim & cherubim, 24 elders, etc.
Other miscellaneous things like the Tree of Life, Living Water, the River of Life, etc.
I’m sure I’ve left something out – please feel free to add it in the comments below. There is so much in the Unseen Realm – people are often amazed to realize how much we are unaware of.
